This conversation is part of the Brown Voices Project—conversations with South Asian Americans living lives that defy the stereotype of what “success” is supposed to look like for us (watch all the conversations on YouTube).
In Brown communities, the definition of success often arrives pre-packaged: a prestigious job title, a clear career ladder, a life that looks a certain way from the outside. But what happens when you climb that ladder… all the way to the title, the team, the role your college self would have wanted… only to realize none of it feels like anything you actually wanted? And what does it look like to be building something else while keeping the job that makes everything else possible?
That’s some of what I talked about with Sabeen Margub: henna artist, content creator, tattoo apprentice at Vacation Forever Tattoo, and one of the most quietly extraordinary creative stories I know. Sabeen’s henna has been featured in Vogue, Allure, and Elle Magazine, and she’s the artist behind the henna worn by Lupita Nyong’o at the 2023 premiere of Mira Nair’s Monsoon Wedding musical. Her work has earned her 23,000+ combined followers across TikTok and Instagram and a spot in just about everyone’s saved inspiration folder, including mine.
I spoke with Sabeen about how the pandemic led her to henna, what a therapist’s question revealed about what actually matters, and why she believes two things can be true at once (even when South Asian communities have historically insisted otherwise).
Here are some key moments from our conversation…
Sabeen picked up a cone during lockdown, from the Curry Hill area of Manhattan… mostly out of boredom, working a day job for New York City that couldn’t really be done from home.
And she just kept going.
I just kept doing it. It wasn’t like a conscious decision. It wasn’t something I was like, okay, I’m gonna become a henna artist now. I just kept doing it.
Sabeen Marghoob
She posted everything, including designs she now looks back on with a wince, that she posted during her era of “delusional confidence” (which we should all aspire to build).
By the time pandemic restrictions lifted and a backlog of postponed weddings flooded back into the city, she had enough practice to meet the demand. Some weeks she was working 6 PM to 2 AM, event after event across New York.
That momentum really allowed me to just keep building and just keep working and getting a ton of practice.
Sabeen Marghoob
She was on her way to mastery without quite meaning to be.
Before henna, Sabeen had done everything right by conventional measures. Economics degree, banking internship junior year, offer lined up before graduation, working two weeks after she crossed the stage. She climbed steadily enough to land a manager role with a team reporting to her.
And then she was miserable.
I got to that AVP role and I was like, oh my god — I hate my job and I hate my life. I worked every weekend. I worked evenings. I found it really difficult to be there for my team and to manage when my heart just wasn’t in it.
Sabeen Marghoob
She didn’t quit outright. She recalibrated — stepped back from the climb, moved into a consulting role, traded the title for flexibility — and reframed what the job is actually for.
My art is by far the most important thing to me. And my job is very much just a means to an end. Every day when I log in, I know why I’m doing this. I’m doing this so that I can do everything else.
Sabeen Marghoob
The reframe, she says, has made the job more meaningful — not less.
One of the most interesting tensions we talked about was whether to monetize the art at all. Sabeen’s fully independent creative friends largely give her the same warning: don’t do it.
Creative work has always been my outlet. So the idea of doing it full-time and it being the moneymaker — it’s a weird mind shift.
Sabeen Marghoob
A therapist once asked her: if you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do for the rest of today? Her answer told her everything she needed to know.
I would create art, I would spend time with my friends and family, I would eat a lovely, beautiful meal that I’ve cooked. And I think that was really eye-opening to me.
Sabeen Marghoob
(Related: Jyoti Chand (Mamajotes) on owning your time and building a creative career on your own terms)
Sabeen’s advice for young South Asian kids feeling pressured toward a narrow definition of success is practical, generous, and doesn’t require burning anything down.
Two things can be true at once. You can pursue the things that pay the bills at the same time as pursuing your creativity. You don’t have to be one thing.
— Sabeen Margub
She talks about running into younger people — her cousin who just graduated college and looks like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders — and the thing she most wants to say is: you have time.
Whatever you do — give it your all. Even if you give it that little bit every single day, that little bit of consistency can go such a long way. I didn’t choose to do henna as an artist. I just kept doing it without really thinking about it.
— Sabeen Margub
(Related: Vishal Vaidya on creativity as a way of life, not a job path)
I wish they knew that Brown kids were also struggling as much as all the other kids. Just because they’re working all night, that doesn’t mean they don’t need the extra help — or that extra push, or just someone telling them they believe in them.
Sabeen Marghoob
She thinks back to AP Physics — a class she describes as genuinely beyond her, which she somehow passed anyway. What she remembers wanting wasn’t for someone to lower the bar. She wanted someone to notice.
It would just have been nice to know that I did my best. Even for those kids — they’re doing their best. They’re working really hard.
Sabeen Marghoob
And she named something that the research in this book documents in detail: the myth operates on two tracks at once. The Brown kid who is struggling gets overlooked because the assumption is she’s fine. And the Brown kid who is thriving, barely, under enormous pressure — also gets overlooked, for the same reason.
I’m so grateful for the work ethic that was instilled in me. But on the other hand, I was just like — was that worth it? I don’t know.
Sabeen Marghoob
(Related: what teachers should know about supporting South Asian American students)
You can follow Sabeen on Instagram at @hennabysabeen or on TikTok, also at @hennabysabeen.
This conversation is part of the Be Inspired archive, a series of profiles and conversations with South Asian Americans living lives that defy the stereotype of what “success” is supposed to look like for us. Snippets of this and other conversations will appear in Brown Voices: South Asian American Experiences in Schools, rereleasing this fall.
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Thank you for reading.
— Punita
